Call yourself a man?

A few weeks ago I published this article, in it I briefly discussed mens rights, however I mostly discussed a really stupid guy who thought saying things like “i also treat girls like objects, though most attractive girls don’t seem to mind” in an actual public forum would net him something other than virtual kidney punches.

It seems though, that I know nothing about mens rights and one lone hero out there wanted to enlighten me.

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From [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

Hello Karl.

I recently read your article on mens rights and felt obliged to message you and tell you that all you’re doing is parroting the same feminist propaganda specifically designed to undermine us men that everyone else does. Mens rights are a real issue that I feel you shouldn’t take lightly or, “joke” about in your little blog. Hopefully one day you’ll see the light, but if you want to really know what mens rights are about, please read this (I removed this link because it contained way! too many!! exclamation marks!!! – Karl.)

Once you’ve read that you should understand more what our movement is about.

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To [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

Hello there big boy.

I’m certainly a little worried that I look like I’m just regurgitating the ideas and opinions of others, thank you for providing me with a link to someone elses ideas and opinions to explain what you meant.

I’m a little worried that you used the term, “us”, do you think we’re similar in some way? Or are you referring to me as a man? Because the only other person to have ever called me a man only did so because I had a mars bar in my pocket while wearing tight jeans.

Please clarify.

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From [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

Karl.

As a fellow man I feel as though it’s my duty to educate you as you’re obviously a smart young man, a smart young man whos not yet seen how the world really works and still believe the lies feminists and women have perpetuated to fool young men like you into thinking they’re the ones who are mistreated. It’s the other way around my friend. Young men like you can’t be blamed for believing the lies though, you’re only just discovering women, one day you’ll wake up and realise what’s really going on.

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To [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

So you’re saying women are trying to make me believe that they’re ones who are mistreated? When in reality the ones who are really being downtrodden by society are guys like me and you? The Western, English-speaking males? Damn them and their devil vagina magic right to hell.

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From [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

Just like someone so young to make wild assumptions, you hide behind your humor but when you’re the one losing everything in a divorce being denied access to your children, you’ll think back to this email.

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Before reading the rest of the article, please enjoy this picture of my dog, Otto. I’ve had feedback saying I use too much text and not enough pictures, I assumed this is what they meant.

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To [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

Wild assumptions? The only assumption I made is that you’re western and English speaking and that’s because you’re messaging me using correct-ish grammar and Americanized spelling. That’s not an assumption, that’s an educated guess, but I should have realised the term “educated” would be alien to you. Surely though, if anyones is making assumptions here it’s you, when you assumed I’d end up getting divorced. How do you know I’m not an incredibly sensitive lover or can get an erection powerful enough to re-enact the chest-burster scene from Alien? How? How do you know eh? Where are your links to disprove that shit, huh?

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From [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

Karl. If you’re not going to take this seriously, I don’t need to answer you. If you have a legitimate question about mens rights I consider it my duty to educate you. If you want to keep making your little “jokes” go right ahead.

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To [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

It’s no fun if I have permission, I guess I have to be serious.

OK, if you’re suggesting women have some sort of secret agenda and men are the ones who are mistreated, why do we earn more? Please answer with an example, not a personal anecdote, your life seems like it would make me sad.

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From [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

Karl. The wage gap I believe you’re referring to is a total myth. It’s a well known fact that women don’t work the same jobs as men and in the jobs that they do, they don’t work as hard, in fact in some areas they actually earn more. Female porn stars for example earn 6 times what their male counterparts do, is that fair Karl?

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To [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

It seems fair to me. Why, how much extra would you ask for if your job asked you to take a dick in the ass from your co-workers?

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From [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

When you’re ready to take this seriously feel free to email me.

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To [redacted]

Subject: Female anatomy article.

I’ll be honest, I’d rather treat it as a joke and have sex with women. You keep messaging men on the internet though, I’m sure that’s going to do you a lot of favours.

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Want to teach me about mens rights? Do it on twitter, the 140 character limit means stupidity is condensed, making it 34% more hilarious and 18% less sad. Science!

7 thoughts on “Call yourself a man?

  1. You are my new favourite person. I just stumbled upon your site & now I’m not going to get any work done today. Thanks a lot.

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