The sincerest form of flattery.

If you read my previous two posts you may or may not have noticed a similarity to the work of David Thorne, this wasn’t a coincidence, I really fucking love that guy and thought I would try to emulate his style for you nice people. It seemed to have worked as they were the most popular things I’ve posted.

So in a similar vein I’m going to try something along the line of what Rod Hilton does with his frankly hilarious abridged scripts. So this is my attempt at an abridged script of the film Taken starring Liam Neeson. Mainly because I found out me and Mr Neeson are the same height, which made me feel cool.

Taken – The  Abridged Script.

I still don’t get why people keep getting in his fucking way.

The film opens with Liam Neeson buying a karaoke machine for his daughter as the movie is apparently set in the 90′s. He then wraps and takes the present to his daughter’s birthday party.

Liam Neeson: Hello, I’m here to see my daughter.

Security Guard: I work for her father, you are not her father.

Liam Neeson:  You’re employer married a woman whom already had a child, as his security guard shouldn’t you know little details like that? You know for fucking security reasons?

Security Guard: Probably. Continue reading