It’s said that a drunk person speaks with a sober tongue. That’s a saying I’ve taken to heart and as a result, I devised and completed a simple experiment. Below you will find a list of questions I wrote while sober, answered by myself when I was drunk. Enjoy.
Sober Karl: Hello drunk Karl.
Drunk Karl: Hi sober Karl!
Sober Karl: How much exactly have you had to drink?
Drunk Karl: Enough
Sober Karl: Alright, could you upload a picture of yourself, to confirm that you’re drunk?
Drunk Karl: Sure!
Sober Karl: So drunk Karl, do you have anything you want to say?
Drunk Karl: My throat hurts
Sober Karl: What’s your favorite colour?
Drunk Karl: Bulue, why the fuck are you asking that?
Sober Karl: Do you think this is a good idea?
Drunk Karl: No, no I don’t, especially considering I don’t remember what questions I asjed,
Sober Karl: What’s your pickup line when it comes to women?
Drunk Karl: Wanna find out if I live up to my last name?
Sober Karl: Does it ever work?
Drunk Karl: That’s personal
Sober Karl: What are you wearing?
Drunk Karl: A black tshirt and underwear with robots on it.
Sober Karl: Are you confused by any of these questions?
Drunk Karl: I’m confused by everything that is currently happening right now.
Sober Karl: Do you want me to start asking normal questions?
Drunk Karl: That would be pretty nice,
Sober Karl: Please tell me you didn’t answer that like you had any control of what was coming next.
Drunk Karl: Fuck you1
Sober Karl: Honestly, do you think this was a good idea?
Drunk Karl: Of course it was, I’m always full of good ideas, like a scientist not bad ideas like a priest who lives near a school.
Sober Karl: Are you now arguing with yourself from the past?
Drunk Karl: No, although I’m a little depressed by how little sober me thinks of drunke me.. also these questions dont seem to have any order.
Sober Karl: Is there any advice you’d like to give to the people reading this?
Drunk Karl: Dont eat yellow snow, but that;s a stupid piece of advice, what kind of people are stupid enough to put shit they find on the ground that smells of piss in their mouths?
Sober Karl: How would you fix the problem of global poverty?
Drunk Karl: One man cant fix the world, superman couldn’t fix that shit and he was fucking superman, what chance fo I have?
Sober Karl: How would you solve the divide between right and left politics?
Drunk Karl: No one can solve that. Those people automatically hate another group of people because they’re not exactly the same as them, that’s like racism or some shit right? Racists are dicks. Fuck racists.
Sober Karl: How about the issue of mens rights, what does drunk Karl think about that?
Drunk Karl: Fuck mens rights, I get emails from the kind of people who believe that shit and they act more entitiled and full of themselves than someone fucking their twin. It always boils down to stuff about rape and no one should argue about that, I think rapists should just all go fuck themselves instead of trying to justify what they’ve done and if you’re a man who thinks he’s the one being discriminated against, fuck you, you can walk around with your shirt off in public.
Sober Karl: Do you want to have any kids?
Drunk Karl: Of course I do, I need people with my DNA for organ transplants and shit.
Sober Karl: Using google, find a link to something you think people reading this would enjoy.
Drunk Karl: DONE!
Sober Karl: Using google find something you think people wouldn’t enjoy or need.
Drunk Karl: BOOM!
Sober Karl: Find something you think will make people smile.
Drunk Karl: HERE YA GO!
Sober Karl: Find something you think will make people laugh.
Drunk Karl: Watch this video, press 7 over and over agian.
Sober Karl: Show us your favourite song.
Drunk Karl: SHAZAM!
Sober Karl: Are you still drunk, or are you sobering up?
Drunk Karl: A picture says a thousand words right?
Sober Karl: Go get some sleep.
Drunk Karl: NIGHT!